Letter to Ojichan

Dear Ojichan (grandpa, my Japanese father-in-law who passed away several years ago), I have come to the ohaka (family grave) today to let you know that I am home. You knew I would come back, right? I hope you can understand me – maybe heaven provides translators – because my Japanese is worse than ever. I apologize for any shame I’ve brought to the family by losing my job. Leaving Japan was necessary and I hope you can understand that I did it for the sake of my children. Tomohiro is now off to college; you would be so proud of the young man he’s become. Maya is here in high school and has your determination, strength and desire to excel. She definitely embodies your spirit and I know when I see her, that you are near her.

We really need your guidance to keep things going around here. I’m not sure we can even keep the farm with all the changes that are taking place but I promise we will do our best to try. After all you did to try and change the zoning on the big field so we could pay for the kids’ schooling, it still hasn’t been approved. Is it any surprise that the land owned by the mayor has been slated for development and he’s becoming rich off of it? It’s all politics. You knew how to play their game as well as anyone and we could use some of that wisdom. I’m trying to continue what you taught me about pruning the trees and taking care of the yard. You were right about the grass, it is hard to take care of and even harder to control once it starts to grow. Taka didn’t do a very good job of maintaining things so maybe you can send him a sign to step it up a bit. Ojichan, your son needs your strength. You held the family together and he just doesn’t know how to take charge. I’m really going to make an effort to help obachan. She’s going pretty strong at 84 but I know she needs an extra pair of helping hands and I hate to say it, but your daughters are beyond reproach- they are selfish and lazy.

After being away for four years, I’ve come to appreciate what we have here. It isn’t perfect; nowhere is. But I’m proud to be part of your family and will do my best to honor that. I don’t always like being here and I will always feel torn between the two countries, but I have gained some perspective during my time away and I want you to know that I am glad to be back and I am here to make the most of it. We never talked much, we never really had the words to share, but I think we understood each other pretty well. I miss having you here to guide us. So one last thing, I need to plant a few new trees to replace the ones your son cut down, so if you have any ideas on that, let me know. Thanks.